yes, i did write this weeks loudNOTES

no, i did not come up with the subject line

(though it is damn funny)

“what you dont know is the kind of control freak he really is”

as per a semi-dare- ray medina, bonafide, jess and fish got called with morning intros today

“and next up at the copy machine…”

mucho fun last nite, the list and the house were a little thin when i got there but by the end- twenty open-micers! for some reason that is the number that makes me happy

though there is something to be said for nine-teen… TEEN!

“define growth”

i love nothing more than to put into action all those endless debates we have about art, vision, craft, the future, literature, the canon, et al

i dont think there is anyone i love that i have not had at least one good- Well, you know, you’re wrong!

type conversation

just because you are my friend doesnt mean we have to agree all the time

“you just presented the most exquisite precise argument i have ever heard, but guess what oscar, that still doesnt mean you are right”

a few months back it was pointed out that one of the flaws to Acentos is that some great poets will not have an opportunity to feature there and that conclusion is dead on the money. HOWEVER, in its short time Acentos has brought the spotlight to a bunch of folks that have wanted to read but dont get asked, go figure. AND, it has inspired many folks to pick up the pen with a thought that is bigger and greater than just getting a TEN or just selling product. meaning, we’ve helped some folks and not helped some others… well, after a year and a half of this i think i can live with that especially after hearing amalia talk about how she was able to bust a piece in front of the ox that she doesnt like to do so much since non-latinos only focus on the stereotype and not the person. w.e.r.d.

“you aint got no love”

oh, i got mad love its just my arms are only so long and i aint trying to hug the world just mah friends

“and that gets a WEPA!”

WEPA!

i will be hosting louderMONDAYS. this should be interesting. technically, its my second time up to bat, the first being a louderJAM i co-hosted with lynne that had some problems beforehand (what else is new?) and ended on a real high note with the bar singing Happy.Birthday to a certain newcomer to the scene by the name of mara jebsen.

funny how hosting at 13 has never been high on my list of stuff i wanted to do poetically and there are a few thing i would like to do but havent gotten the chance to do… yet

to put it in real perspective, i just finished doing a ten a.m. poetry workshop in spanish harlem. a 90 minute class on the most gorgeous summer solstice i can remember and the kids listened the whole time and wrote some stuff at the end. i only did two poems of my own and a willie perdomo cover of ‘Where I’m From’ and spent the rest doing q&a and talkin about the process. and, to top it all off, these are special ed kids (they never tell me these things before hand- they just LOVE popping these things on me AFTER the fact!) and it went GREAT…. so if i can survive the 5th grade special ed inclusive class of ps 57- a room full of poets looks pretty easy in contrast

still, i plan on putting my own little brand of silliness on the night. come on by, should be fun!

but also neccesary

Click to join the oscar_bermeo yahoo group

a couple of cool things on the horizon so be on the lookout

w.e.r.d.

i am feeling overwhelmed as of late… in that ‘doing a lot but not feeling like i am doing enough’ type mood… the end of the year recitals killed me… i will never look at a five year olds award ceremony the same way again… i am getting the hang of my job… my boss is a real teacher and i feel like i am learning a ton from her… i drank too much last night… the bartender was being hella cool with us and saying ‘no’ felt like an insult to his generosity… it is a good thing that i cant hold my alcohol… if alcohol does not improve your performance on stage- you should really stop drinking before reading… if it does improve your performance but you are a belligerent drunk- you should leave pretty much as soon as you finish reading… if alcohol does not improve your performance and makes you a nuisance- 12 steps, thats all im sayin’…. the first time jess saw me read i was piss ass drunk and delivered one of my best performance ever… the next day i decided that if being the best on stage meant four drinks beforehand- poetry was dead… getting piss drunk and then going out into the crowd was how i learned to dance at clubs… this may explain a lot if you have ever seen me dance… thought of smoking weed once to improve the poetry… ‘it lets you step out of yourself and look at your work from the outside in while still being true’… hmmm… ‘no, i cant sleep a wink without at least two puffs’… ok, that idea is dead… my mom respects that i have sacrificed for my poetry… that means tons people… i have gotten better at not responding to emails right away… people love not being themselves… dont ask for opinions, you just might get them… “poetry is just a giant coin with only two sides- bad poetry & good poetry. you’d be surprised as to where i think my work lands.”…. if you ask me to look at your poem and i give critique- its cuz i like it… if you ask me to look at your poem and i have little to say… i didnt go to college long but my mind acts like i did… i have a massive headache… having a book doesnt make you a poet, it makes you an author, there is a difference… when you do a friend of a friend a favor, thanks arent necessary- its just fuckin common sense… nebulous posts are whack… i might be in love with someone whose name i will never tell you… moving seems like a valid idea from time to time… this headache wont quit… there are still at least half a dozen persistent thoughts in me that will become poems one day…. one day is the most nebulous measure of time there is… i am doing too much… i am not doing enough… maybe time to do something different… i wish i could paint… or sing… or play the guitar… would love to play the guitar… something to hang close to the bed and turn to instead of SportsCenter… i am not lonely simply for the reason that i am not that accustomed to being with someone…